Friends and Photography...

I know that alot of tips get posted from other photographers, but I'm going to touch base on something that doesn't get mentioned very often. That is friends and photography. This has become a little bit of a touchy issue for me, as I feel that alot of people who I thought were friends always ask me the same question:

"How much will you charge me for pictures?"

This has made me question not only my friendships with these people, but their ethics as well. I mean, how would they like it if a boss at work asked, "How about I only pay you a dollar an hour today, I mean, we're friends, right?" Won't happen right? Same with photography. This is our profession. This is how we pay our bills. To ask us for a discount is no different than an employer asking to pay their employee less.

Another question I get asked by friends:

"What are you doing Sunday? Can you come take our pictures?"

We have certain days off a week so that we can do things with our families, get caught up on work that we couldn't finish during the week, etc. No different than anyone else's family. My Sundays are usually spent with the kids doing things I couldn't do on Wednesday or Saturday because I was in the studio or at a wedding.

And probably the worst question to ask a friend who is a photographer:

"How much will you charge me to photograph my wedding?" Or worse yet,
"Can you shoot my wedding?" Meaning, at no charge?

Depending on how good a friendship we have, has it occurred to this type of person that we may enjoy being a guest at their wedding rather than working it? I had a friend who always said I was her best friend. When it came time for her to plan her wedding, I got a call from her. "I have an important question for you about my wedding." I thought I was going to be asked to be a bridesmaid. Nope. "How much will you charge me to take pictures at my wedding?" Enter the gut punch. So, how do you handle your friend who is a wedding photographer?

1. Don't expect that you will get a huge discount on your wedding pictures just because you are friends. We put the same amount of effort into our friends weddings that we do everyone else's. We spend the same amount of time editing photos and creating albums on for our friends as we do everyone else's. So why not pay us the same amount? Now if we offer, that's another story. But don't ask us about a discount.

2. Had it occurred that we might enjoy taking a wedding off and being a guest having fun along with all our other friends at your wedding?

3. If you're not sure, ask us. Ask if your wedding day is available and if we would rather be a guest or if we would rather be a photographer. Honestly, from my perspective, I would rather be a guest at the wedding of a good friend. After shooting 2 friends weddings, there is an odd strain that normally isn't there for me at other weddings for both me and the bride.

4. Keep in mind that if we are a friend at your wedding that we will more than likely still have our camera with us. So make sure that the photographer you do hire knows this and ask if there are any restrictions on our using our camera! This will cause unwanted tension for not only you, but for us as professionals also! I allow people to take pictures as long as they are not in my way. I do not allow professional cameras at weddings I shoot unless the bride is purchasing the rights to the images. This stipulation is in my contracts.

I'm sure the feedback I get from this posting won't be pretty and I don't want to step on anyone's toes.